D.C. pounds Buddahs

D.C. unloaded on Team Buddah yesterday to the tune of an 18-4 drubbing. The Slappers totalled 20 hits, scoring all but one run in the first five innings. Starter Tom Gorzelanny took most of the damage, surrendering 12 runs (10 earned) and 10 hits in just 3.1 innings. Sammy Sosa and Carl Crawford were both 4-6 and Carlos Beltran had 2 HRs and 5 RBIs in the contest. Derrek Lowe won his 3rd game while pitching six innings of three-hit ball and striking out 7.

Marietta opened up their Battle of the Basement series against Sardine City with a 2-1 squeaker. Micah Owings was lost for the better part of a month, but the Mighty bullpen did a fine job to limit the Sardines to only one unearned run on 11 hits and struck out 9 Hangmen. Cole Hamels took the hardluck loss, pitching 6.1 innings and striking out 8. B.J. Upton was 3-5 in the game and raised his average to a league-leading .393.

Sardine City squeezes out twin wins

The Straphangers took two games from the Falcons yesterday, becoming the final DMBL team to earn its 10th victory of the season. The Straphangers are now tied with the Mighty Men for 13th overall. An Alex Rodriguez error in the seventh inning of the first game gave the Sardines a 3-2 victory. The two teams both made costly errors - both teams only gave up one earned run each - forcing both starters to accept a no-decision despite solid performances. In game two, Fausto Carmona pitched six shutout innings to earn his second win of the year. Ryan Braun and B.J. Upton hit back-to-back homers in the fourth to give the Hangmen a 2-1 win.

The Falcons were so frustrated by the lack of offense that they ripped up the roster and jettisoned outfielder Joey Gathright, catcher Brad Ausmus, and second baseman Mark Ellis. In their place, the Falcons signed DMBL veteran second bagger Luis Castillo, recent Hillsborough castoff Ryan Ludwick, and catcher Yorvit Torrealba, who was with Marietta earlier this year.

Randy Johnson struck out 13 Hitmen in seven innings en route to a 5-1 win for the Sugar Bears, completing a 4-game sweep. Newark is now 19-0 in the Cereal Bowl this season.

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Chipper Jones hit his ninth HR of the season Saturday, No. 350 for his career, moving past Jeff Bagwell into 11th place. Vlad Guerrero is right behind him, tied with Bagwell, and recently surpassed Larry Walker at 348, 14th overall.

In pitching, John Smoltz matched David Wells for ninth all-time in games started at 315. He also snapped a tie with Mike Mussina for wins, earning his 162nd victory, 8th all time.

Straphangers break hex

Yesterday was a day for poorly-starting pitchers to redeem themselves.

Sardine City broke their long losing streak yesterday with a 4-2 victory over Blue Ridge. Cole Hamels, who had struggled so far this season, pitched six innings and allowed only one earned run, but did not factor into the decision. B.J. Upton scored the winning run in the eighth after leading off the inning with a double, then advancing on a wild pitch. Team owner Greg Calvosa said they found the cause of their struggles - a Chipper Jones jersey buried in the dirt just outside the dugout in their stadium.

Hillsborough and New Jersey threw out two of their slumping starters against each other, so you'd expect a 2-1 pitcher's duel, right? Tom Gorzelanny pitched a complete game, giving up only one earned run on seven hits and striking out 11. But that wasn't good enough! Justin Verlander pitched a solid 7.2 innings, only giving up one run, and striking out 7. He did not figure into the decision. The Hitmen ended up winning the game in the eighth when Billy Butler hit an RBI-double to take the lead.

Vancouver won their eighth straight game and completed the sweep of Hoboken with an 11-4 win yesterday. Chase Utley was 4-5 and Mike Lowell hit two homers and drove in four to lead the 18-hit onslaught.

Finally, A.J. Burnett pitched a 3-hit shutout of the D.C. Bushslappers to improve to 4-0 on the season. Burnett struck out nine and walked four in the effort. The Pack held their one game lead over the Philadelphia Endzone Animals for the best record in the league.

DMBL Site glitches, Butch suspected

Yes, the league's site has been experiencing technical difficulties in the past 24 hours. Problems began yesterday morning when security guards at the league's main server facility witnessed a pair of shady characters wearing blue and yellow apparel leaving the compound. The site was restored in the afternoon then went down again. Once again guards found strange evidence inside the compound - a "Nation of Butchlam" logo was spray-painted on one of the walls. Late last night the site was once again restored, but it was a short-lived resurrection. As of this posting, the site is still down. Police reported pulling over a vehicle with Billy Spiers, Jim Eisenreich, Mike Caruso, and Jeff DaVanon inside. None of the four accomplices would cooperate. The DMBL has tasked George Mitchell to investigate into the matter.

Some quick notes on yesterday's games... Arkansas completed their sweep of Newark yesterday, marking one of the bigger upsets in this young season. The Falcons scored nine runs in the final three innings to take a one-run victory over their bitter rivals...Jake Peavy, still enjoying his box of JR Cigars from last week, pitched a dominating one-hit, 12-strikeout game against the Cutters. "Next week, I'd like some Montecristos please" said Peavy on his way to the dugout after the game...Sardine City continued their slide with their 11th straight loss.

Falcons stun Sugar Bears

For the second straight game, the Falcons have knocked off the Sugar Bears. After winning 10-4 Monday, the Falcons continued with an 11-8 win yesterday. Kevin Kouzmanoff and Miguel Olivo of all people led the Falcon offense with three hits each. Both starters were out by the fourth inning, but it was the Sugar Bears' usually reliable bullpen that failed them, particularly Joaquin Benoit, who surrendered four runs in 2.1 innings and took the loss. Arkansas sends Ian Snell to the mound today to try for the sweep against Chien Ming Wang. Though Wang has seemed invincible so far this season, did anyone think that the Falcons stood a prayer of winning with Wandy Rodriguez on the mound?

Vegas' eight-game winning streak was snapped as the Bushslappers won by a 5-2 count. John Maine was shaky but pitched out of several jams to earn the W, while Carlos Beltran delivered with 3 RBIs. Carlos Pena tied the league lead with his 13th homer for the Rat Pack.

Vancouver won their sixth straight with a 5-1 decision over Hoboken. Greg Maddux pitched 5.2 innings of shutout ball to win his third. Hoboken had hoped to get Joe Beimel into the game before they released him but they thought that putting him into a losing situation might damage his psyche. "Joey just hates losing and coupling that with cutting him could make him lose it" said manager Wally Backman. Beimel pitched briefly for Vancouver last season.

Dustin McGowan made a triumphant return from injury, limiting the slumping Straphangers to only one run and four hits in 7.1 innings. The Straphangers' loss extended their losing slide to 10 games.

Vegas courts Lady Luck

The Rat Pack won a 6-5 decision over the Bushslappers in 11 innings, taking their eighth straight. The interesting thing about the victory is that it brings the Rats' record in one-run games to an astounding 8-0, by far the best in the league. Only Philadelphia is also undefeated in one-run games, but they are only 3-0. Carolina is second in one-run victories with 6, but they also have 6 losses. The Rats also lead the league in extra-innings wins with 3 (out of 3 games). These stats usually indicate a large amount of luck, but with the Rats you can't really be sure. Time will tell if the ball bounces the other way in the Pack's future.

Tampa Bay looks back on track after picking up their third straight victory, a 9-6 stunner over the Philadelphia Endzone Animals. Pat Burrell and Torii Hunter each had 3 hits and 2 RBIs to lead the Plunkers to victory.

Meanwhile, the Straphangers dropped their ninth straight game, a 5-3 setback to Blue Ridge. Daisuke Matsuzaka, despite having a solid season so far, dropped to 1-5 on the year after 7.2 mediocre innings. The Sardines jumped out to an early 3-0 lead but slowly saw their lead erode, eventually tied in the fifth inning. Prince Fielder drove in the winning run in the bottom of the eighth and the Bombers tacked on an insurance run. Russ Springer entered to close the game out and despite being a bit wild (12 pitches, 5 strikes), the Sardines were shut down.

Joel Pineiro made his last start for the Cutters - at least for the time being - and was given his outright release. The Cutters resigned Joe Beimel, who had been cut to make room for Pineiro, to a special one-day contract. "We feel bad that Joe didn't get into a game last time" said manager Wally Backman. "We'll try harder this time around." Beimel is expected to be released when Aaron Cook is eligible to come off the DL tomorrow.

Vancouver trounces Marietta

Vancouver laid the smackdown on Marietta over the weekend, sweeping a 4-game set in dramatic fashion. In the four games, Vancouver outscored the Mighty Men by a 51-17 margin, scoring at least 10 runs in each game. Vancouver evens their season record at 14-14, while Marietta dropped their fifth straight game and fell behind Team Buddah.

Arkansas's Jeremy Bonderman had been roughed up all season long, but in yesterday's second game, he pitched a 6-game shutout of New Jersey. The win was the first or the season for Bonderman, who also struck out nine in the game. Alex Rodriguez was 4-4 with 2 RBIs in the game and Mark Ellis also had two hits.

Blue Ridge and Newark battled to an 11-10 final, with the Sugar Bears winning. Blue Ridge was clinging to a one-run lead going into the final inning, but Newark rallied to tie and then win the game on a Chipper Jones single. After a high-scoring game like that, both teams appeared tired in the second match, as the two teams combined for six runs in a 4-2 win by Newark. Ted Lilly did his best to keep the Sugar Bear lineup in check (5 IP, 3 H, 1 ER), but his counterpart, John Smoltz, pitched equally well (5.2 IP, 4 H, 1 ER, 7K). Once again, Chipper Jones gave his team the lead with a 2-run single.

Several players, especially catchers, returned from injury over the weekend. Newark regained Yadier Molina, Las Vegas welcomed back Joe Mauer, and Kurt Suzuki returned to Sardine City. Pitcher Shawn Hill was activated from D.C.'s disabled list.